Look Past it All
by Latice-And-Ribbon
Summary: Crookedstar and some of his family take a look at their past life. ((Quickly written while my internet was down. Quite short.) Inspiration drawn from: /s/9198053/1/Look-Again and /s/9080638/1/A-Mother-s-Love Read these stories! They're awesome! :D)
1. Forgive

Rainflower? I tried so hard to impress her. I jumped, rolled, played like any other kit. It wasn't my heart that was different. It was my face. My face was just an accessory, surely? Something that should be looked past. It doesn't define me.

I was better than Oakheart at most of it. Why should she prefer him? What sort of mother was she? No matter what I did, I was always Oakheart's inferior. Why should I be? I was more skilled than him. More agile. A better hunt. He may have looked better, but that doesn't make him any different.

I know that I may have left her on the river bank. But I truly thought that she was dead. Mapleshade tricked me. Rainflower would know that, wouldn't she? She's a Starclan cat.

I became deputy, yet even then, I couldn't impress her. She never came to me in dreams. Once she died, that was it. Even in Starclan, she avoids me, treats me like she always did.

Hissing.

Snarling.

Eventually, I was leader. Oakheart never did that. What gives her the right to treat me so poorly? I deserve her respect, as she deserves mine. All I ever did was try to make her love me again, but I was young. I didn't know that I couldn't make her love me.

I wish I had.

But once again, we should look past cat's mistakes.

We need to learn to forgive.


	2. Accept

While I was alive, I never met Rainflower. I never heard stories about her, but why would I want to? My grandmother tore my father to pieces. Whenever I looked at him, I saw it. The empty light in his eyes. I wish that I could say I was like him in that respect. But I wasn't. I had a motherly figure in my life who treated me as her own. He had no one.

When I was just a kit, admittedly, his face was slightly scary. It was different, but his eyes had no evil in them. He never hurt any cat, yet he spent his whole being hurt by the one who should love him most. She should have taught him how to behave. Perhaps if she had been there for Crookedstar, Mapleshade wouldn't have hurt him the way she did.

I wonder how she would feel, knowing how much pain she inflicted on her innocent son?

She probably knows. I've never talked to her in Starclan, but that doesn't mean that I'm too blind to see how she scorns him. The hatred runs off of her like river water. She thought that she didn't have to deal with him after the accident. Felt as though it wasn't her duty.

Rainflower could never take him for who he was. She would have loved him, if she had let herself.

We need to learn how to accept.


	3. Love

My mate. She seemed like such a loving, beautiful cat. She gave me such perfect kits. My sons. But that's where our love ended. With poor Stormkit. When he injured himself, of course, I was shocked. Why shouldn't I be? But mostly, I was worried. I knew that Rainflower was worried too. But too bad, she was worried for the wrong things.

I worried for his health.

She worried for his looks.

How vain do you have to be? His life, his love, his heart are far more important than his face. A face is just something to recognize him by. Why should any cat be branded by their appearance? But worst of all, I can't believe that she renamed him. He didn't deserve it. My son was Stormkit, not Crookedkit. Then, once she branded him with such a horrible title, she was _shocked _when I told her that we no longer mates.

I heard her talk behind my back.

Saying I had no right to leave her like I did.

Well, maybe she should ask her son. It pained me as I watched him desperately trying to impress her, make her happy. Deep inside, I knew, and I think that he did too, that it wouldn't work. That no matter what he did, she would never accept him.

All because of his face.

She could have loved him. Been a mother to the bravest and most loyal warrior that I've ever seen in all the clans.

We need to learn to love.


	4. Look Past

I never understood the rest of my clan; Crookedstar was a good cat. He was kind, friendly, loyal and definitely one of the best fighters in the clan. I can't say that he didn't look odd though. Yet I could look past it. Sometimes, though, I felt like the only one who could.

Perhaps he felt the same way.

He was definitely deprived of mother's love. I would know what it feels like; while I lived in Windclan, I had my father, sure. But a mother? Fallowtail was as far away as she could be. Untouchable to me, living in another clan. But this isn't a story about me. It's about my perfect mate. I've approached Rainflower in Starclan, yet all she can do is talk about what he did wrong.

Can't she see what he did _right_? Though this is my story, not hers. I'm sure that she'll be happy to tell you all about her son. What he did wrong. Of course he wasn't always right. No cat is. She made mistakes as well, like leaving Crookedstar in the dark as a kid. Just talk to her. She'll tell you about him. Her _imperfect _son. No. He _was _perfect to me. We shouldn't be judged by how we look. His appearance may have been crooked, but not his heart.

It was loyal and true. Why else would Hailstar make him deputy?

Crookedstar is a message to the rest of us; we should look past how a cat looks, past their face, past their pelt. Straight at their heart.

We need to learn to look past it all.


End file.
